if only...
YOu know, every now and then, everyone goes through this period of time when you start to think wad in the world are you living for and you can just sit for an entire day and still can't get an answer?....
Then paranoia sets in, then unexplainable gloom and lonliness, then u start to think why are u thinking like that. Pure waste of time. Then u start to think about all the things that once were so so so importent to you simply just doesn't even matter to you anymore? Then after a while you just feel so fresh and revivied and all geared up to start all over again?
I guess i'm somewhere stuck between paranoia and gloom right now. Funny how you can start to imagine all those very, very out of this world situations that sometimes just freak out. An active imagination that canno be controlled will NOT improve things. Such is the life of a mentally-deprived kid sucking up to sci-fi novels for the last eight years. then again, i would't be where i am today without those stuff. Anyways,while at this point of stage and time, with the promos looming so near and so many problems still left unsolved, all the if-onlys starts to apear one after another...
1)If only I've spent less money on toys...i wouldn't be so freaking broke now...
2)If only I've been more forgetful..maybe some of the things i keep thinking about would just go away...
3)If only I wasn't so forgetful...then i wouldn't keep forgeting the wrong things...
4)If only I didn't hide in this mask all the time, things may have been better, even better then now...
5)...............
6)...........
7)........
8).....
9)...
so much, yet in reality, so little...
most of us jus live..in regrets and all...but who really has a life out there now?..